kindness

A house is where people live but a home is where people are loved. Sometimes, the bonds of family have no relation to biology. That’s why when a group of fraternity brothers learned their “second mom” needed help to retire, she didn’t even need to ask. Jessie Hamilton worked as a cook at the Phi Gamma Delta fraternity house (affectionately known as Fiji) on the campus of Louisiana State University from 1982 to 1996. Though the single mom had three kids of her own, she treated the young men in her care like surrogate sons—listening to their worries, offering counsel, and even driving them to doctor’s appointments or ferrying them to the grocery store on occasion. “I enjoyed doing it. They loved my cooking,” Hamilton told The Washington Post. “I was always there to talk things through with them. They’d come in the kitchen and sit on top of the counter and tell me their problems.” Andrew Fusaiotti, who’s now 52 years old, was a Fiji brother in the late 1980s. “She was truly like a mother to us,” he told the Post. “She treated us like we were her own kids. She was always looking out for us.” After leaving LSU, Hamilton found herself balancing multiple jobs to maintain her financial stability, a challenge she had faced since the age of 14. In 2006, at the age of 60, she took out a 30-year mortgage for a house she hoped to retire in, yearning for a place to call home. Over the years, she kept in touch with several fraternity brothers, including Fusaiotti, who now owns a car dealership in Mobile, Alabama. At the onset of the pandemic, Fusaiotti reached out to check on Hamilton and was disheartened to learn that she was still working multiple jobs, with retirement not in sight for her foreseeable future.Not doing something to rectify the situation wasn’t an option for him. Fusaiotti reached out to Hamilton’s family to determine a suitable monetary goal and began rallying his fraternity brothers for financial contributions to pay off her mortgage and provide her with a financial cushion. With donations averaging between $600 and $1,000 from approximately 91 alumni, Fusaiotti’s efforts culminated in a total of $51,765 raised. Just days before Hamilton’s 74th birthday, the fraternity officially declared April 3 as “Jessie Hamilton Day,” celebrating the occasion with a catered party where they presented her with two large checks: one for $45,000 to pay off her mortgage and another for $6,675 for her personal use, along with commemorative T-shirts and koozies, all infused with love and cherished memories. As Fusaiotti and the other young men whose lives Hamilton touched can tell you, sometimes guardian angels turn up in unlikely places—including the fraternity kitchen—where you’ll find them doling out generous helpings of fried chicken, red beans, and comfort that goes way beyond comfort food. “She is the type of person that inspires me, people that don’t have a lot but give a lot,” Fusaiotti told The Advocate. “She’s the most giving person you’ve ever met.”

Caught sight of a truly exhilarating scenario and I feel everyone should learn a thing or two from it. A man, Fernando and his wife were waiting in the ticketing line, he overheard a man at the counter trying to get a ticket to Las Vegas. He was having trouble. He only had $150 and that wasn’t enough. The ticketing agent was pretty unhelpful and told him he needed to go online and look for other options. The man kept trying to explain his situation to her but wasn’t getting anywhere. His English language abilities were limited, so it was difficult for him to communicate. He was becoming increasingly frustrated—and she was becoming increasingly indifferent. After he finally, despondently, turned away from the counter, Fernando, went up to the man and asked what was up. He speaks Spanish so was able to understand his story. The man had lost his job here in the San Francisco area, had no place to live, and only $150 in his pocket. He had family who were living in Las Vegas and was trying to get there. He was told he could get a ticket for $150, but told Fernando that he couldn’t read, didn’t have a computer, and didn’t know how to access the internet from the airport—let alone navigate how to purchase a low fare ticket. Fernando believed him and wanted to help him. They walked back to the counter and Fernando purchased a $330 ticket to Las Vegas for the man. Fernando didn’t ask for anything and trusted that this guy’s story was true. He followed his heart, because he wanted to help him. And most importantly, he did. While we hope that this incredibly kind gesture from a stranger, who paid attention and cared enough to listen to this man’s story and take some action, be a turning point for him to get back on track, we hope most fervently, that this will inspire us all to learn to treat people with more compassion than ever before. It was a Good Samaritan helping another who was down on their luck—most likely an immigrant, most definitely a human being—so he might have some safety, better his life, and be with his family. Not only that, a month later when Fernando’s wife was going through the credit card statement, she saw the charge and asked her husband, “Wasn’t that ticket $240? Why is the bill $330?” Fernando sheepishly replied, “I upgraded him.” On this note, I sincerely hope that we too will learn to, within our capacity, upgrade those we come in contact with.

A generous couple has been secretly stuffing money into diaper boxes and under formula canister lids at local Targets in order to help out struggling families. Krystal Duhaney is a registered nurse and the founder of Milky Mama. A soon-to-be mother of three, when she and her husband Patrick had their first child, they realized just how expensive raising a family can be. Now they’re in a better place financially, they can afford to give back to others—so they’ve stuffed about $1,000 in cash into various baby supplies around Los Angeles Target stores, and they’re not stopping any time soon. “We recalled how hard it was for us as new parents to afford some of the basics and we could imagine how difficult it must be now,” Krystal explained to TODAY.  “We hope that the parents that purchase these items have a brighter day when they find our gifts” Krystal added. May the difficulties we experience cause us to be more understanding of the situation of others, inspiring us to be kinder and more compassionate.

Being in the right place at the right time can be a matter of life and death. During a 100-kilometer cross-country race in Gansu province, China, an unexpected ice storm struck, endangering the lives of many runners. Zhu Keming, a local shepherd, faced the harsh conditions to rescue six participants, three men and three women. On the day of the race, temperatures were mild as Zhu tended to his sheep. However, the weather quickly deteriorated, plunging into freezing temperatures accompanied by sleet and hail. Seeking shelter, Zhu took refuge in a cave where he had stored emergency supplies. From this vantage point, he spotted a runner in distress, appearing immobilized and disoriented. Zhu brought the distressed runner to the cave, where he lit a fire to warm him up. After ensuring the man was safe, Zhu returned to help five more runners find shelter. His actions were undoubtedly lifesaving, as many participants were inadequately dressed for the sudden cold, with lightweight clothing that left them vulnerable to hypothermia. Tragically, 21 out of the 172 athletes succumbed to the storm. One of the rescued runners, Zhang Xiaotao, expressed his gratitude on Weibo, stating, “Without him, I would have been left out there.” Despite the acclaim, Zhu remains humble, insisting he is “just an ordinary person who did a very ordinary thing.” However, the athletes he saved, their families, and many others recognize the extraordinary nature of his courage and timely actions in a life-threatening situation. If there’s ever anything right you could do to help a fellow, just do it.

The Gusah Family made a significant contribution by donating their ancestral land in Mbabagu Village for the establishment of a clinic years ago. They conducted a land survey to delineate their grandfather’s boundaries among his brothers, the sons of Gedege: Lan, Gusa, and Namtsav in Vandeikya LGA of Benue State, Nigeria. The clinic has been functioning lowkey with a small team of three Community Health Extension Workers (CHEWs). This year, the family has taken a more proactive approach, committing over N20 million to renovate the clinic, construct a three-bedroom boys’ quarters, and hire a qualified Nurse-Midwife, Sister Terver Saa-Aondo. Their objective is to transform the clinic into a state-of-the-art primary healthcare facility, adhering to the current guidelines set by the National Primary Health Care Development Agency (NPHCDA). Following this event, Sister Terver will initiate a comprehensive assessment of the community’s healthcare needs, with plans to raise funds to address these issues through a two-year action plan. This initiative represents a public-private partnership aimed at promoting local social development. Attention is particularly drawn to the deep sense of empathy demonstrated by the Gusah Family, when we emulate this magnitude of selflessness and concern for the needs of others, we would be painting the true nature of kindness in living colours.

A 27-year-old pregnant mother, Alyssa DeWitt, is being celebrated as a hero after she rescued four children from drowning at Lake Michigan’s First Street Beach Pier. On a windy Tuesday afternoon, Alyssa hesitated before taking her children to the beach, concerned about the strong winds. However, she ultimately decided to go. While at the beach, Alyssa noticed a group of girls, all under 15, struggling in the water. Alarmed, she saw one girl waving her arms for help, which prompted her to act. “I got up, pulled my kids out of the water, and ran out onto the pier,” she recounted. Alyssa attempted to call 911, but the noise from the waves made it difficult for the dispatcher to hear her. Realizing she couldn’t wait for help, she laid on her stomach on the slippery pier to reach the girls. Despite being five months pregnant, she fought against the waves to pull them to safety. “Every time I’d get one of them halfway up, a big wave would come smashing into us,” she explained. “My turning point was when one of the little girls looked at me and said, ‘I’m going to die.’ That was it for me and I was like ‘I’m not going to let you die, I’m going to get you out of this water, I promise.’” She managed to pull all three girls out of the water and over the pier before the group set off back towards the shore to rescue a fourth girl who had managed to get closer to shore but couldn’t stand because her leg was injured. “I honestly do not know how I did it, it was pure adrenaline at that point,” Alyssa said. Once all the children were safe on the beach, emergency services arrived. Alyssa sustained a swollen wrist but both she and her unborn child were unharmed after a check-up at the hospital. While there are numerous lessons and inspirations to draw from this incident, I want to beam our TORCH on Alyssa’s determination and predisposition to kindness. Despite being five months pregnant, she was driven by compassion and chose to risk her own safety to save the lives of four young girls. If we all embraced a mindset of thoughtfulness and selflessness in our actions, the world would be a much more peaceful and beautiful place.

This uplifting moment showcases the extraordinary teamwork of villagers who united to retrieve a pickup truck that had tumbled down a steep hill. A man was traveling along the slope when he lost control and skidded off the dirt road in Chiang Mai province in northern Thailand. More than fifty locals volunteered to pull the old vehicle that rolled over the hills and was stuck on the edge of a cabbage field terrace. They helped the driver out of the truck before tying thick ropes around the truck to pull it. After almost an hour, the vehicle was successfully towed back to the road. Malinee Laowang, a niece of the driver, said: “I saw the pickup truck toppled down the hill and flipped multiple times.”  “I remember running towards the car and smashing the windows open with a rock to let my relative out. More villagers came to help us even without asking.” Malinee’s uncle narrowly survived the crash and only suffered minor cuts and bruises and the car was dragged back to the driver’s home. Malinee added: ‘My uncle was not seriously hurt and his car would be repaired. I would like to thank the villagers for helping us out.’ When we stick to the Ubuntu Philosophy and enshrine the spirit of togetherness and brotherhood into all we do, we would be healing the world from the infamy of pains and cruelty induced by human greed and selfishness.

Sometimes when friends try to hold you back from being too generous and kind, you know you’re doing something right. When icy temperatures this past winter froze Kodak, Tennessee, shutting power down and freezing pipes, Sean Patel, owner of the local Quality Inn, wanted to do something to help his neighbors: open his hotel to all comers, even if he ran out of rooms, and provide them food and warmth until the power came back on. “I frequently ask him to dial it back a bit because I know he’s spending so much of his own money and energy to help others, but he has such a big heart, I know he will only give more,” says his friend Steve Smith, who nominated the Quality Inn for Nicest Places in America. But Patel wouldn’t listen. The immigrant from India, who came to America in 2004, saw goodness in the people around him when he settled in Tennessee—and wanted to be a part of it. “I saw how much people helped each other in the South and it got to me,” explains Patel. “It’s not always about money. Sometimes you just need to talk. I always wanted to be that kind of person.” So, he did what came naturally: Patel took to social media to say, “If you can get here, we will take care of you.” Even at maximum capacity, Patel would make space for those who needed it whether that be in the lobby or around the pool area, just so they could have someplace warm to be. Between Christmas and New Years of 2020, all 60 rooms in the hotel were completely booked with some rooms housing as many as eight or nine adults. Some guests even stayed in the lobby or meeting rooms just to have a warm place to be. A couple rooms under maintenance were used so guests in the lobby could take a shower, which Patel’s team sanitized thoroughly after each user. People came together in ways that Patel has never seen before. Everyone pitched in. Some guests even paid for each other’s rooms. Everyone was sharing food. The hotel staff turned on their breakfast station so people wouldn’t have to worry. Later in the winter, when a similar freeze hit Texas, Patel did the same with another hotel he owns, the Segovia Lodge. Power lines came down and pipes froze over as the cold engulfed an unprepared Texas. Patel waived all fees so anyone who could get to the hotel could stay and eat for free all week. Guests even walked to the hotel because their cars couldn’t get through. The hotel eventually lost electricity and stranded truckers took turns staying up all night to keep a fire going. All of the rooms were full, yet Patel opened the lobby floor so more guests could be sheltered. With over 200 people at the hotel, there wasn’t any fuss. No one argued. Everyone made sure the others were comfortable, warm, and fed as they took turns cooking for each other.  “It wasn’t about who was Black, White, Democrat, Republican. COVID, or no COVID, everyone was a family,” says hotel manager Shelly Shirley. All the guests who were at the Segovia Lodge during the freeze have even kept in touch via a Facebook group! They check in on each other and keep up with news from each other’s lives. “Business is down, but I still have clothes on my back, the kids were safe, we had a shower and food,” says Patel. “We all have to look out for each other.” It’s of utmost importance to remember that our motivations shouldn’t solely revolve around financial gain. The kindness we extend to others will linger in their hearts long after our wealth and material possessions have faded away.

High school graduations are one of the most important rites of passage in a teenager’s life. Four years of hard work, friendships, and dreams for the future all culminate in a shining moment that will be remembered long after the caps and gowns are collecting dust. Now imagine Daverius Peters’ dismay when on May 19, as he headed into the ceremony to receive his diploma, he was stopped at the door by the fashion police. Although his black-topped, white-soled sneakers were anything but outrageous, Peters learned they were in violation of the school’s dress code and he was denied entry. It looked as if Peters was about to miss his chance to walk across the stage with his classmates—until someone stepped in with both feet—and shoes—to turn things around. When the distraught senior caught sight of a friendly face he went looking for help. John Butler, a para-educator at Boutte, Louisiana’s Hahnville High School was on hand for the graduation as a parent, not a staff member, but once he learned the details of Peters’ predicament, he accompanied the young man he’d come to know and respect back to the entry to see if he could change the gatekeeper’s mind. “I was hoping that maybe if she saw me with him, she would let it go, but she insisted on not letting this young man in, and I didn’t have time to go back and forth with her,” Butler told The Washington Post. “It was a no-brainer… This was the most important moment in his life up to that point, and I wasn’t going to let him miss it for anything.” Without missing a beat, Butler simply swapped his size-11 loafers for Peters’ size-9 athletic shoes. With seconds to spare, Peters made it inside the venue just as the doors closed and was able to keep his place in the graduation line. Although his family was initially confused by the last-minute wardrobe substitution, they were thrilled that Butler’s quick thinking kept a joyful celebration from turning into an ugly situation. “I wasn’t surprised because Mr. Butler is that type of person,” a grateful Peters told The Washington Post. “At school, if you’re having a bad day, he’ll be the one to take you out of class, walk around the school with you and talk to you.” It’s said that a truly generous man will give the shirt off his back to someone in need. Now it seems, the adage also applies to the shoes off his feet. Our minds may forget beautiful faces, but never the ones who lit our way through the darkness. This here is an invitation for us all to stay kind wherever we find ourselves. If we can’t help others, may we at least not add to their struggles and pains.